New Song! Own Worst Enemy

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It’s my first song of 2018!!!

And be warned: if you listen to the words too closely you’ll find that it’s not a very happy song. This song is part of a larger series of songs where for every sad or un-empowering song I write I must then write a happy or empowering song to acknowledge my negative emotions but not drown in them. This song is about those self-destructive feelings of self-doubt that can pervade the mind and make yourself feel small and worthless. When I think these horrible negative thoughts I become my own worst enemy. Let me know if you relate and look out for a happier tune coming soon…ish. My writing pace has grown slower over the years but I’m still proud that I haven’t given up songwriting and I’m still churning out tunes. Enjoy~ and lyrics below~

Lyrics:
I could show you how to ruin everything
I could show you how to make yourself feel as low as dirt
I could show you how to use anything
As a path to shred yourself of any worth
I could show you what words to use, what thoughts to think steadily
In no time even you could be your own worst enemy
I could spell it out from beginning to end
I could do that for you, but who’d want that kind of friend?

Chorus:
I can find a million ways to make myself feel small
When I want everyone to think me beautiful and tall
I walk among the giants and sling myself as I go.
I’m both the child and the monster. Both the hero and the foe.

A bad day is just a way to know I deserve less.
Wait. Is this my brain purposely adding drama to the mess?
If the tower of my tears is built one stone at a time
Then I’m the master carpenter and I climb and climb and climb.

(Chorus)

Ripping myself into tiny pieces is no way to be a martyr
But being kind to myself, being kind to myself, being kind to myself feels so much harder.

I could show you how to ruin everything
I could show you how to make yourself feel as low as dirt.
I could spell it out from beginning to end.
I could do that for you but who’d want that kind of friend?

(Chorus)

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